Challenging Shame & Rebuilding Self-Worth in Eating Disorder Recovery

Shame is a silent, but powerful companion in eating disorders. It whispers, “You’re not enough” or “You’ve failed”. The harder you try to push it away, the stronger it can feel. Recovery requires not just changing behaviors, but cultivating self-compassion and understanding the ways shame shows up in your life.

Recognizing Shame Triggers

Shame can appear in many forms: critical self-talk, avoidance of social situations, or obsession with body image. Awareness is the first step toward breaking the cycle.

Therapeutic Exercise (CBT-Based):

• Write down shameful thoughts as they arise.

• Examine the evidence for and against each thought.

• Reframe the thought into a compassionate statement: “I am allowed to make mistakes. I am worthy of care and respect.”

Tools from DBT and ACT

• Radical acceptance: Accepting what is happening without judgment reduces the power of shame.

• Defusion (ACT): Notice shameful thoughts without fusion. Saying, “I notice the thought that I’m not enough” creates space between you and the shame.

Glennon Doyle reminds us: “We can do hard things, and we can also love ourselves through them.” Recovery is the act of doing hard things while holding yourself tenderly.

Practical Self-Worth Practices

• Daily affirmations focused on your strengths

• Engaging in activities unrelated to body image

• Journaling successes, no matter how small

Shame does not define you. By using therapeutic tools, embracing self-compassion, and practicing daily affirmations, you can challenge shame and rebuild a sense of worthiness. Recovery is not linear, but every step forward does matter.